Tuesday, August 13, 2013

Floaties of Hope


Growing up, I was always what you might call really buoyant.  I was definitely not afraid of the water—I was a fish.  And I floated really well.  My friends all went through the typical stages of swimming—toes in the water, blowing bubbles and floaties.  I liked the idea of floaties but I never really needed them.  Any opportunity I had to swim at the pool or the ocean, I took it.  I was not afraid of the water—or the possible dangers of jumping into the deep end.  I was fearless.  I can’t recall a childhood summer memory (good or bad!) that doesn’t involve the pool or have the smell of the ocean attached to it.   

About 6 months ago I lost my job.  Anyone who’s read my previous blog post on here knows that I knew unemployment was coming.  I thought—oh how I thought!—I was prepared for it.  I had nearly a year of God’s faithfulness to get ready.  But when the call from my boss came, it was almost like a physical blow to the stomach.  I was prepared as much as I thought I could be.  And I was completely unaware of the journey I was about to take.  I am generally an optimist but for once I was adrift and I seemed to have forgotten how to swim. 

I think God does that on purpose—if we actually knew what we were going to encounter beforehand, we wouldn’t take a single step.  I honestly thought I’d have a job after 6 weeks of unemployment and be good to go.  But I didn’t and I wasn’t.  But my hope did not fail.  I knew—I just knew—by the end of the month, I would have a job.  Each month came and went and still no job.  What was worse is that after the first few weeks there weren’t even nibbles.  If I thought I was adrift and lost beforehand, it was nothing compared to this.  All of a sudden, I was bewildered, and paddling just to keep my head above water—both emotionally and financially.

However God has been throwing me floaties of hope all along the way.  Like a 3 year old afraid of jumping into the pool I strap the floatie onto my arm and keep plodding along.  I can’t pay my mortgage?  No problem.  God provides through the kindness of strangers.  I need a renter for my house?  No problem.  A young couple are looking for a house and home to start their lives together and mine is perfect for them.  I need a place to live?  No problem.  My family takes me and my naughty dog in, no questions asked, no expectations given. 

Hundreds of resumes, cover letters, and applications later I am still saying, “By the end of the month…”  But there are days when I really don’t believe it anymore.  Just when I get to the point of giving up, another floatie appears.  I strap it on and keep plodding.   

To quote my sister “Sometimes even the optimist needs someone to hope for them.”  And that is when another floatie appears. 

True story.